A polyamorous rant
When was the last time
You’re only allowed to love one parent. Choose wisely.
You’re only allowed to love one pet. Choose wisely.
You’re only allowed to love one child. Choose wisely.
You’re only allowed to love one sibling.
So why do people say
You’re only allowed to love one person.
What To Do When Your Boyfriend’s Asshole Best Friend Says, “Hey, Never Trust Anything That Bleeds For Seven Days And Doesn’t Die,
OR The Only Poem I’ll Ever Write About Periods.
Don’t excuse him because he’s had
at least three lite beers
and is sweating through his black button down
that his mom or exgirlfriend
probably bought him.
Don’t excuse him because he’s been turned down
by the last six girls he went on dates with
after meeting them on tindr
with a picture that’s seven years old
Don’t excuse him because
he’s usually such a nice guy
because you don’t want to be a bitch
because you don’t want to cause a scene
because when you were seventeen
your sister told you
no one likes an angry feminist
Let me explain something to you.
Every goddamn motherfucking month since I was eleven,
a part of me
tore itself to shreds
ripped itself apart inside me
and then remade itself.
So yes, I bleed for seven days
and I don’t die
You know what else can do that?
Things of legend.
Fuck, I can even
So I say, never trust anything that can’t
bleed for seven days and not die.
You know what that makes it?
So let’s see, hon,
What you’re made of.
If you can bleed for seven days
and not die.
Rip out his jugular with your teeth.
And when he bleeds for seven seconds
spit on his corpse and say,
I thought not.
one time in 7th grade i stayed up for 3 days straight just to see if i could. on the third day in history class i watched my hand and pencil warp through my desk and my friend beside me nudged me and said “you’ve been staring at your hand for the past 30 minutes” and ever since i always get enough sleep and you should too
…I was not myself for weeks yet nobody noticed.
LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING ABOUT THIS STUFF
I BOUGHT IT
TRIED IT ONCE
I THOUGHT IT WAS HORRIBLE
IT WAS STICKY AND CEMENTED MY LIPS TOGETHER
IT GOT ON EVERYTHING
IT DIDN’T SUPER-STAY
I THREW IT INTO MY DRAWER WITHOUT ANOTHER THOUGHT
AND THEN OUT OF THE BLUE I DECIDED TO TRY IT AGAIN
HOPE IN MY HEART, PEACE IN MY SOUL, I DECIDED TO TRY IT AGAIN
I READ THE DIRECTIONS
AND ALL OF A SUDDEN, I SAW THE LIGHT
I COULD SEE CLEARLY NOW, THE RAIN WAS GONE
YOU HAVE TO PUT THE RED STUFF ON FIRST
WAIT FOR IT TO DRY
COMPLETELY (I MISSED THIS STEP BEFORE)
IT SHOULD BE SO DRY AND IF YOU KISS THE BACK OF YOUR HAND, NO MARK SHOULD SHOW
AND THEN I PUT THE BALM ON (I ORIGINALLY TRIED PUTTING THE BALM ON FIRST…. DON’T DO THAT.)
AND IT GOT RID OF ALL THE STICKINESS
AND THE RED DOESN’T EVEN GET ALL UP IN THE WHITE BALM
IT WAS A MIRACLE
THIS STUFF IS THE FUCKING BEST
IT STAYS ON FOR A REALLY LONG TIME
IT DOESN’T GET ON ANYTHING
AMAZING I WANT TO BUY THIS IN FORTY SHADES OKAY I ENCOURAGE YOU ALL TO TRY IT
NO BUT DO KEEP IN MIND THAT IT REALLY DOES STAY ON FOR A VERY VERY LONG TIME
AS IN, LONG ENOUGH TO FORCE YOU TO SCRUB IT OFF AT THE END OF THE DAY
THIS STUFF ISN’T FOR THE WEAK, THIS IS FOR THE POWERFUL BADASSES WHO WASH THE BLOOD OF THEIR ENEMIES OUT OF THEIR CLOTHES AT THE END OF THE DAY LIKE ITS NOTHING
IF YOU RUB TOOTHPASTE ON YOUR LIPS IT COMES OFF EASIER
YES THIS IS A GOOD TIP I HAVE HAD THIS EXPERIENCE
GIVE IT A LIL SCRUB WITH THE OL’ PEARLY WHITE RUB A DUB DUB
IT WILL COME OFF
IT WILL DO AS YOU COMMAND
THIS MAKEUP O B E Y S
IT S T A Y S
Things that need to stop being in kid shows.
"I can’t lose to a girl"
"I can’t believe I lost to a girl"
"you let a girl beat you"
If you keep showing these types of mindsets to kids they’re going to think they should think that way as well.